Sometimes, we Catholics tend to overcomplicate confession: “Was this a sin? Do I need to confess that? Do I really even need to go to confession?”
A good rule of thumb when approaching the Sacrament of Reconciliation is if you think something might be a sin, then there’s no harm in confessing it. Don’t take it from us, though: take it from Father Gary Selin, a priest professor at St. John Vianney Theological Seminary who’s been teaching the confession class for over 10 years. He teaches future priests how to hear confessions when they’re eventually ordained.
There are lots of guides out there on how to make a good confession, and certainly most of them are beneficial. However, Father Selin has noticed that many of them are missing a few key points about how one ought to confess their sins and which sins need to be confessed.
“Two things that normally get omitted in such accounts are: 1) mortal sins must be confessed according to number and kind (i.e., how many times one has committed such sins since one’s last confession, and what it was), and 2) venial sins do not have to be confessed as such, but can be confessed generally. This can help one simplify one’s confession, which is already a difficult process.
“In fact, venial sins can be forgiven outside of Confession in other ways, but it is good for a penitent to confess those venial sins that are deeply rooted in one’s soul.”
The below guide, adapted by Father Selin, is simple yet effective. Consider using it next time you go to confession.
How to make a good confession
Make the Sign of the Cross and say: “Bless me, Father, for I have sinned, it has been (mention the time) since my last Confession, and these are my sins.”
Confess your sins clearly and sincerely, including the embarrassing ones.
If you feel nervous, or uncertain about some sins, ask the priest to help you. You must mention the number of times that you have committed a mortal (serious) sin. However, it is not necessary to mention the number of venial sins.
When you have finished confessing all the sins that you remember, you can say something like: “For these sins, and any sins that I may have forgotten, I ask pardon from God.”
The confessor may give you some advice, and then he will assign to you a penance. Then, at his invitation, you can pray the Act of Contrition.
Act of Contrition
O my God, I am heartily sorry for having offended You, and I detest all my sins because I dread the loss of heaven and the pains of hell; but most of all because they offend You, my God, who are all good and deserving of my love. I firmly resolve, with the help of Your grace, to confess my sins, do penance, and to amend my life. Amen.