God has a mission for grandparents, and contrary to a popular bumper sticker, it’s not to “spend our children’s inheritance” in a self-indulgent life of leisure apart from family. Rather, Deuteronomy 4:9 proclaims, “teach [God’s commands] to your children and your children’s children.” Grandparents are to hand on the faith as a spiritual inheritance.
To help grandparents do that, St. John Vianney Seminary’s lay division will offer one of its most popular new workshops for free: “Grandparents: God’s Secret Weapon to Pass on the Faith,” will be presented online from 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. July 22. Anyone may register at sjvlaydivision.org/registration. This will be the first time the workshop is offered for free and the first time it will be presented online.
“It’s to commemorate the feast of Saints Joachim and Anne (July 26), the grandparents of Jesus, as well as the third annual World Day of Grandparents and Elderly (July 23),” said Sandy Wanzeck, the instructor.
Wanzeck holds a master’s degree in Biblical Theology from the Augustine Institute. She is in her 11th year teaching in SJV seminary’s lay division.
Joachim and Anne are the patron saints of grandparents. The first Grandparents Workshop, offered near the patron saints’ feast last July, sold out immediately. Space doubling the seating was added, and that too was snatched up. A few months later, a second workshop was presented in a location twice as large, which also filled to capacity.
“That told me there was definitely an interest in learning more about this topic,” Wanzeck said. “The workshop gathers grandparents together so we can share the wisdom we have acquired on how to pass on the faith. I introduce three different topics, then we have time for small group discussion. In a workshop, you do some of the work.
“I have eight-years-experience as a grandmother, but among the participants we may have over a thousand years of experience,” noted Wanzeck. “Someone has gone through what you are experiencing or has the same question. Maybe something you are going to say is something another person needs to hear.”
The three topics explored in the workshop are: Today’s Culture vs. the Bible, From Dreams to Reality, and Difficult Situations and Resources for the Mission.
Today’s Culture vs. the Bible
“The culture today says old things and old people are not valuable,” Wanzeck said. “It teaches that retirement is all about you. That you should live your life independently from your family. That your main role as a grandparent is to be a playmate — to fill your grandkids with sugar and gifts and send them home.”
That is not the message one finds in the Scriptures. There, the message is that one’s golden years are a time for sharing wisdom, mentoring the young and passing on a spiritual inheritance. Using information from Josh Mulvihill’s book Biblical Grandparenting, Wanzeck said, “We’ll go through 10 truths we can find in the Bible about grandparents.”
Primary among those truths is that grandparents are to leave an inheritance. Proverbs 13:22 says, “The good man leaves an inheritance to his children’s children.”
“That’s not just about a monetary inheritance, but a spiritual inheritance is even more important. Passing on the faith, leaving the good name and reputation of your family,” Wanzeck said. “Also, we’ll talk about how grandchildren are seen as a blessing. Proverbs 17:6 says, ‘Grandchildren are the crown of the aged.’”
From Dreams to Reality
While attending a baptism class for her eldest daughter, Wanzeck said the instructor asked, “What are your dreams for this child? What virtues, skills and habits do you want them to have? What are you going to do to help make those dreams a reality?”
“So, I tell parents, whether you did a perfect job throughout their upbringing or wish you’d done differently, this is your chance for a do-over. To do what maybe you wish you had done with your children.”
Allen Hunt’s book, Dreams for your Grandchild: The Hidden Power of a Catholic Grandparent is used as a resource to look at seven steps on how to turn one’s dreams for a grandchild — to be honest, to know Jesus, to go to heaven, to be a saint — to become reality.
“Hunt talks about how beyond the parents, grandparents are the next most influential person in a child’s life,” Wanzeck said. “Studies have shown that even greater than a teacher, pastor, coach or peers, grandparents are the second most influential person. Grandchildren pay attention to what we’re saying or doing.”
Difficult Situations and Resources
Wanzeck will address a handful of difficult situations. Among them:
• Many grandparents feel they’re not qualified to pass on the faith.
“In the Bible, God always chose people who by worldly standards didn’t seem qualified,” Wanzeck said. “Noah was a drunk. Jacob was a liar. Moses had a speech impediment. We see that God will qualify those he calls.”
• Some grandparents feel at a loss because they live far from their grandchildren.
“A study by Oxford University showed that distance didn’t negatively impact the influence the grandparents could have,” Wanzeck said. “Part of this is because of technology—there are many ways you can communicate. If you’re uncomfortable with technology, your grandchildren can probably help you learn how to text or do Facetime. You can set times to talk: You can ask one another what you’re grateful for today or what you can pray for this week.
“The important thing is to stay connected, whether you live close by or far away. You can live in the same house and not stay connected. Don’t let distance be an obstacle to not connect with your grandchildren.”
In addition to numerous books, including The Catholic Grandparent’s Handbook by Lorene Duquin, and websites available to equip grandparents to hand on the faith, other resources include taking classes at St. John Vianney Seminary Lay Division and starting a parish group of the Catholic Grandparents Association (CatholicGrandparentsAssociation.org), which promotes transmitting the faith and keeping prayer at the heart of family life.
Anyone can start godly grandparenting by praying, Wanzeck said.
“Psalm 78 talks about how prayers can influence generations to come, not just our children and grandchildren. Having a strong faith may be because a prayer warrior in a previous generation was praying for us.”
You are invited to learn more at the free workshop, “Grandparents: God’s Secret Weapon to Pass on the Faith,” presented online 9:30 a.m. to 12:30 p.m. July 22. Register here!